Dealing With Grief

I like the ball and the box analogy when talking about grief. The analogy goes like this; There is a box with a ball in it and a pain button. In the beginning, the ball is huge. You can't move the box without the ball hitting the pain button. It rattles around on it's own in there and hits the button over and over. You can't control it, it just keeps hurting and sometimes it seems unrelenting.

Over time the ball gets smaller, it hits the button less and less but when it does hit, it hurts just as much. It's better because you can function day to day more easily. But the downside is that the ball randomly hits that button when you least expect it. For most people, the ball never really goes away. It might hit less and less and you have more time to recover between hits, unlike when the ball was still big.

The other thing I have noticed in my life is that my grief journey if not the same from person to person. Maybe this is because of the relationship we had or didn't have, regrets, anger, etc. Maybe it's being able to be there or not being able to be there. Maybe it's because you watched them suffer, or they were taking suddenly, or taking tragically. Whatever happened or whatever you are experiencing just know that its ok and normal to feel the way you do.

I will leave you with this, make sure you are experiencing whatever feeling come up. Don't bury them, instead shine a light on them and move through them. Also you are never alone, lean on the ones you trust and on creator to help you through these hard times, even if its just a listening ear.